| How to Make Ice Cream with Snow Posted: 05 Jan 2017 04:00 PM PST Snow days can be fun but exhausting when the entire family is stuck at home. Treat the kids and yourself with a delicious treat. Step outside and help your family make their own "snow cream", a seasonal homemade ice cream perfect for the freezing whether. Keep the supplies handy and experiment with different flavors to make sure everyone has fun and is satisfied with their very own snowcream! EditIngredients EditSimple Vanilla Snowcream - 1 cup (250 ml) milk
- ⅓ cup (80 ml) granulated sugar
- 1 tsp (5 ml) vanilla extract
- 1 pinch of salt
- 8 cups (2000 ml) of clean snow
EditChocolate Peanut Butter Snowcream - ½ cup (125 ml) Hershey's chocolate syrup
- ¼ cup (60 ml) peanut butter
- ¼ cup (60 ml) milk or cream
- 1 tsp (5 ml) vanilla
- 8 cups (2000 ml) of clean snow
EditChocolate Peppermint Snowcream - 8 cups (2000 ml) of clean snow
- 1 (14 oz) can sweetened condensed milk
- ¼ cup (60 ml) unsweetened cocoa powder
- ½ tsp (2.5 ml) peppermint extract
EditAmaretto Caramel Snowcream - 1 cup (250 ml) white chocolate chips
- ½ cup (125 ml) thick caramel
- ⅓ cup (80 ml) milk
- ½ (2.5 ml) salt
- ¼ cup (60 ml) Amaretto
- 12 cups (3000 ml) clean fluffy snow
EditCake Batter Snowcream - ½ cup (125 ml) sweetened condensed milk
- ¼ cup (60 ml) yellow cake mix
- 3 Tbsp (45 ml) cake flavored vodka
- 2 Tbsp (30 ml) milk
- 1 tsp (5 ml) vanilla
- 8 cups (2000 ml) clean, fluffy snow
EditMaking Simple Vanilla SnowCream - Prepare your ingredients. Gather the following flavor ingredients. Chill them in a refrigerator or covered outdoors if you live in a sub-zero climate so the snow does not melt.[1]
- 1 cup (250 ml) milk
- ⅓ cup (80 ml) granulated sugar
- 1 tsp (5 ml) vanilla extract
- 1 pinch of salt
- Whisk the milk, granulated sugar, vanilla, and salt together. Using a large bowl, pour the four ingredients together and mix. Make sure the bowl is large enough and made of light plastic to minimize any heat transfer.[2]
- Mix in the snow. Gather about 8 cups (half a gallon) of fresh snow and mix it in immediately with the vanilla mixture. Time is crucial as you do not want the snow to melt. Mix until you have your desired consistency of ice cream and add any toppings of your choice like sprinkles or cherries.[3]
- The ice cream should typically be fluffy and not runny.
- Make sure you inspect the snow thoroughly as you don't want any debris.
EditMaking Chocolate Peanut Butter Snowcream - Prepare your ingredients. Using a large mixing bowl, mix together the following 4 ingredients. You may also substitute any chocolate syrup for a brand that you prefer.[4]
- ½ cup (125 ml) Chocolate syrup
- ¼ cup (60 ml) peanut butter
- ¼ cup (60 ml) milk or cream
- 1 tsp (5 ml) vanilla
- Mix in the snow. Gather about 8 cups (half a gallon) of fresh snow and mix it in immediately with the peanut butter mixture. Time is crucial as you do not want the snow to melt. Mix until you have your desired consistency of ice cream.
- Top with your favorite ice cream toppings. Whether you enjoy peanut butter bar chunks or sprinkles, add whatever you desire.[5]
- Cover and freeze for an hour. The ice cream may be fairly soft. After you have mixed everything together, cover your ice cream and place it in the freezer or outside if it is freezing temperature. This will give you a harder consistency.[6]
EditMaking Chocolate Peppermint Snowcream - Prepare your ingredients. Using a large mixing bowl, mix together the following 3 ingredients. You may also substitute mint or raspberry for the peppermint extract.[7]
- 1 (14 oz) can sweetened condensed milk
- ¼ cup (60 ml) unsweetened cocoa powder
- ½ tsp (2.5 ml) peppermint extract
- Mix in the snow. Gather about 8 cups (half a gallon) of fresh snow and mix it in immediately with the chocolate mixture. Time is crucial as you do not want the snow to melt. Mix until you have your desired consistency of ice cream.
- Top with your favorite ice cream toppings. Whether you enjoy peanuts or cherries, add whatever you desire.[8]
- Place a lid over the ice cream and freeze. It may take over an hour for the ice cream to freeze once you've mixed everything together. Be sure to use a lid to cover your ice cream before placing it in your freezer or outside in the freezing temperature.[9]
EditMaking Amaretto Caramel Snowcream - Prepare your ingredients. Using a microwave safe mixing bowl, mix together the following 4 ingredients and microwave at half power for 30 seconds. Stir the mixture and microwave again for another 30 seconds. Repeat the process until the mixture and smooth then set it aside to cool.[10]
- 1 cup (250 ml) white chocolate chips
- ½ cup (125 ml) thick caramel
- ⅓ cup (80 ml) milk
- ½ (2.5 ml) salt
- Create a caramel alternative. If you don't have caramel, mix ¼ cup brown sugar, ⅛ cup half and half cream, 1 tbsp butter, and a pinch of salt in a saucepan over medium-low heat. Gently whisk for 5-7 minutes as you cook or until you get your desired thickness. Add ¼ tbsp vanilla and cook for another minute to increase the thickness then turn off the burner and let the mixture cool in a covered container.[11]
- Mix in the snow and Amaretto. Gather about 8 cups (half a gallon) of fresh snow and mix it in immediately with the caramel mixture along with ¼ cup (60 ml) Amaretto. You may also substitute the Amaretto with any liqueur or omit completely. Time is crucial as you do not want the snow to melt. Mix until you have your desired consistency of ice cream.
- Top with your favorite ice cream toppings. Whether you enjoy chocolate chips or roasted almonds, add whatever you desire.[12]
- Freeze to the desired consistency. Once everything has been mixed together, the ice cream may be fairly soft. Simply place the ice cream in a freezer or outside and let it sit in a covered container until it hardens to your prefered consistency.[13]
EditMaking Cake Batter Snowcream - Prepare your ingredients. Using a large mixing bowl, mix together the following 5 ingredients. You may also substitute any flavor of cake mix or vodka. You may also completely omit the vodka and add additional milk.[14]
- ½ cup (125 ml) sweetened condensed milk
- ¼ cup (60 ml) yellow cake mix
- 3 Tbsp (45 ml) cake flavored vodka
- 2 Tbsp (30 ml) milk
- 1 tsp (5 ml) vanilla
- Mix in the snow. Gather about 8 cups (half a gallon) of fresh snow and mix it in immediately with the cake batter mixture. Time is crucial as you do not want the snow to melt. Mix until you have your desired consistency of ice cream.
- Top with your favorite ice cream toppings. Whether you enjoy peanuts or cherries, add whatever you desire.[15]
- Freeze in a covered container. Cover the ice cream once mixed and place it in outside or your freezer as it may be fairly soft. The longer you freeze, the harder consistency.[16]
- If you don't have snow in your area or you're afraid the available snow isn't fresh or clean, substitute finely shaved ice. Don't overwork the blender and use a shaved ice machine if you have one available.
- Instead of milk, you may also add eggnog. Instead of vanilla you could try cinnamon, butterscotch flavoring, or almond flavoring.
- Using a well beaten raw egg adds greater color, nutrition and flavor.
- If you plan to do this indoors, use gallon size freezer bags to store any excess. Freezer bags work well because they are thicker and less likely to develop small holes that will cause the bags to leak.
- To find safe snow, be sure to look for fresh, white powder. It should generally be more than a light dusting on the ground so it doesn't infuse with dirt. If there are footprints nearby, try to avoid that area and look for a section of clean, untouched snow.
- Only use fresh, clean snow. If the snow has been sitting for some time or is any color other than white, don't use it. Eating old, dirty snow can make you sick.
- If salmonella is a possibility in your area, do not eat raw eggs, and do not feed them to children. Cooked custards also work well for ice creams.
- Salt-ice mixtures are hazardous.
- They are very cold, down to about 14°F (-10°C), while still soggy! Don't let children handle them. Wear gloves and handle the mixture with utensils or through a bag.
- They conduct electricity very well. Wash them off your hands.
- They can cause electrolytic corrosion, rusting even ordinarily stainless metals in a matter of hours - especially aluminum. Rinse them away promptly, with plenty of water to get them out of a sink and garbage disposal.
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| How to Relieve a Tension Headache Posted: 05 Jan 2017 08:00 AM PST When you have a tension headache, you may feel like there is a tight band around your head, squeezing tighter and tighter around your temples. You may also experience pain in your scalp or neck.[1] Though tension headaches are the most common type of headache, their causes aren't well understood. Experts believe they may be triggered by responses to stress, depression, anxiety, or injury.[2] with the right treatment, you should be able to find relief.[3] EditUsing Medication and Professional Treatment - Take over the counter headache medication. These include acetaminophen (Tylenol), ibuprofen (Advil, Motrin) naproxen sodium (Aleve), and aspirin. Never take more than the amount recommended on the package, and use the lowest dose that relieves your headache.[4][5]
- Keep in mind a combination of over the counter (OTC) headache medications and caffeine can cause liver damage if used in high doses or for a long period of time, especially if you also use alcohol or have liver problems.
- Talk to your doctor if you take over the counter headache medication for more than a week and are still having tension headaches.
- Don't take OTC headache medications for more than a few days a week, and don't take them longer than a week or ten days without consulting your doctor. Overusing pain medications can cause rebound headaches, which occur with long-term use of headache medicines. You can become reliant on the medication and have headaches if you stop taking it.[6]
- Ask your doctor about prescription medication. If your tension headaches do not go away with OTC drugs or lifestyle changes, your doctor may prescribe stronger medication. These include naproxen, indomethacin, and piroxicam.[7]
- These prescription medications can cause side effects such as bleeding and upset stomach and raise your risk of heart problems. Your doctor should tell you about any side effects or complications before prescribing these to you.
- If you experience chronic tension headaches and migraines, your doctor may prescribe a triptan to relieve the pain. But opiates and narcotics are rarely prescribed because of their side effects and the risk of addiction or dependency.[8]
- Try acupuncture. Acupuncture involves the insertion of fine needles into specific points in your body. The needles are then manually stimulated or stimulated electrically. This increases blood flow to the area around the needles and releases any tension or stress.[9] Studies suggest that it may be helpful to relieve chronic tension headaches.[10]
- Acupuncture causes very little pain or discomfort and should only be performed by a certified acupuncture specialist. When performed correctly, acupuncture is proven to help reduce tension headaches.[11]
- Dry-needling is another type of treatment that involves acupuncture needles. However, it is not based on the principles of traditional Chinese medicine, as acupuncture is. It involves inserting acupuncture needles into trigger points to stimulate the muscles to relax, lessening the tension that can cause headaches. It can be performed by healthcare professionals trained in the procedure, such as physical therapists, massage therapists, and doctors.[12]
- See a chiropractor. Studies suggest that spinal manipulation therapy performed by a licensed chiropractor may help treat tension headaches, especially if they are chronic.[13][14]
- You can find a list of Chiropractic Licensing Boards in several countries at the Federation of Chiropractic Licensing Boards website. Always have treatments performed by a trained, licensed chiropractor.
- Ask your doctor about massage therapy. Medical massage therapy is a little different than massages given just for relaxation. Targeted massage therapy for the neck and shoulders has been shown to be effective at treating tension headaches and reducing their occurrence.[15] Ask your doctor for a referral for medical massage.
- Health insurance companies may not cover massage. However, they are more likely to do so if you have a doctor's referral. Speak with your health insurance provider to determine whether this option is covered.
- You can find licensed and certified massage therapists with the directory search provided by the American Massage Therapy Association here.
- Have your eyes examined. Eye strain is a common tension headache trigger. If you have frequent headaches (two or more per week), schedule an eye examination. Difficulty with your vision could be contributing to your headaches.[16]
- If you wear glasses or contacts, consider contacting your eye doctor for a new exam. Your vision can change, and if your prescription is no longer what you need you could be straining your eyes.
EditUsing Home Remedies - Rest in a dark, quiet room. Stress is one of the main causes of headaches. And once you have a tension headache, you may be sensitive to light or sound. To counteract this, sit or lie down in a dimly lit room. Close your eyes and try to relax your back, neck, and shoulders.[17]
- Turn off sources of noise like a television, computer, or cellphone.
- You can also close your eyes and cup them with the palm of your hands. Apply light pressure for two minutes. This will help to shut down your optic nerves and relax you.
- In a dark, quiet room you can also try a neck exercise. Place your palm on your forehead. Use your neck muscles to lightly press your forehead against your palm. Make sure you keep your head upright as you press your forehead against your palm.[18]
- Do a deep breathing exercise. Deep breathing can help you relax and reduce any stress in your body, including your head. Take slow, even breaths and try to relax.[19]
- Close your eyes and take several deep breaths.
- Exhale slowly, relaxing any areas in your body that feel tight. Picture a beautiful scene, like a sandy beach, a bright sunny garden, or a country road.
- Drop your chin toward your chest. Slowly rotate your head in a half circle from side to side.
- Take another deep breath and exhale slowly. Continue picturing the beautiful scene in your head.
- Repeat this exercise until you are in a state of relaxation.
- Apply a hot or cold compress to your head. Heat and cold can help to relieve pain and muscle tension in your neck and head.[20]
- Apply a moist hot towel or warm compress to the back of your neck or on your forehead. You can also take a long, hot shower, being sure to run water down your head and on the back of your neck.
- Wrap an ice pack in a towel and place it on the back of your neck or on your forehead.
- Apply peppermint oil to your temples, your forehead and the back of your jaw. Peppermint can have a nice soothing effect and ease any discomfort or pain.[21]
- Once you massage in a few drops of oil, you should feel a cooling sensation on area. Breathe deeply and find a quiet place to sit or lie down.
- If you have sensitive skin, dilute peppermint oil with a drop or two of olive oil or water before applying it.
- Hydrate with water or herbal tea. As soon as you feel tension in your head, drink several glasses of water. Or make yourself some herbal tea to put yourself in a relaxed state of mind. Dehydration may trigger headaches.
- Avoid consuming caffeine or alcohol as these will only dehydrate you more.[22]
- Massage your face, head, and hands. Do a targeted mini-massage on your upper body. Use your fingertips to rub the back and sides of your head. Then, gently massage the areas under your eyes.[23]
- Move your scalp gently back and forth using your fingertips. Don't move it more than a half-inch or so.
- You can also run your fingertips along the inside of each of your fingers and rub your palms.
- Try an acupressure massage to ease headache pain. This is a simple acupressure technique you can do on yourself at home.[24]
- Place your thumbs near the base of your skull.
- Locate the depressions on both sides of where your head meets your neck. They are just outside the thick muscle that runs down the middle of your head, or about 2 inches from the center of your head.
- Using your thumbs, press in and upward until you feel a slight sensation on your head.
- Keep pressing lightly with your thumbs and move your thumbs in small circles for 1-2 minutes.
EditAdjusting Your Lifestyle - Exercise regularly. Physical activity can help to release any stress or tension in your body and produces endorphins in your brain, which fight off pain in your body.[25]
- Do 30 minutes of walking, biking, or running at least three times a week. Be consistent with your exercise routine.
- Stand in Mountain Pose to improve your posture. Having good posture can help keep your muscles from tensing up. It can also release tension in your head. Doing yoga poses like Mountain Pose will improve your posture and relax you.[26][27]
- Stand with your feet hip width apart.
- Roll your shoulders back and place your hands at your sides.
- Pull in your abdomen and tuck your tailbone toward the floor.
- Tuck your chin towards your chest. Try to hold this pose for at least 5-10 breaths.
- Sit in Stick Pose. This is another good yoga pose to improve your posture and practice deep breathing.[28][29]
- Sit with your legs straight out in front of you.
- Flex your toes so they move towards you.
- Roll your shoulders back and place your hands at your sides on the floor.
- Pull in your abdomen and tuck your tailbone towards the floor. Tuck your chin towards your chest. Try to hold this pose for at least 5-10 breaths.
- You can also cross your legs if straight legs is uncomfortable for you.
- Avoid food that contains MSG and caffeine. MSG or monosodium glutamate is a flavor enhancer commonly found in Chinese food. Some people react to MSG by developing a headache. But there is no scientific link between MSG and headaches.[30] Other foods that may cause headaches include:[31]
- Chocolate
- Cheese
- Foods containing the amino acid tyramine, found in red wine, aged cheese, smoked fish, chicken livers, figs, and some beans
- Nuts
- Peanut butter
- Some fruits, like avocado, banana, and citrus
- Onions
- Dairy products
- Meats containing nitrates, such as bacon, hot dogs, salami, cured meats
- Fermented or pickled foods
- Get at least 8 hours of sleep a night. A consistent sleep schedule will ensure your brain and body are free of anxiety and stress, two big causes of tension headaches.[32]
EditPreventing Tension Headaches - Keep a headache diary. This can help you to identify the source of your headaches and how you can adjust your environment and habits to avoid them.[33]
- When you start to feel a headache coming on, write down the date and time it began. Note what you ate or drank the hours before the headache. Write down how long you slept the night before and what you were doing before the headache. Make a note of how long the headache lasted and what methods worked to make it stop.
- Practice relaxation and stress management techniques daily. This could be a morning yoga class, a 15 to 20 minute meditation or a deep breathing practice before you go to bed.[34][35]
- Exercise at least three times a week to keep your anxiety and stress at bay.
- Maintain a healthy lifestyle. Avoid caffeine, alcohol, and smoking. Get 8 hours of sleep a night and take care of yourself by avoiding stress at home and at work.[36]
- Eat balanced meals that do not contain MSG or other headache inducing foods.
- Drink lots of water every day and stay hydrated.
- Talk to your doctor about preventative medications if you have chronic tension headaches. Your doctor will examine you to make sure your headaches are not actually migraines or something more serious. If your headaches continue despite other pain medication and therapies, your doctor may prescribe preventative medication. These include:[37]
- Tricyclic antidepressants. These are the most commonly used medications to prevent tension headaches. Side effects of these medications include weight gain, drowsiness, and dry mouth.
- Anticonvulsants and muscle relaxants, such as topiramate. However, more study is needed to determine the effectiveness of anticonvulsants and relaxants for tension headaches.
- Keep in mind preventive medication can take several weeks or more to build up in your system before they take effect. So be patient and continue taking the prescribed dosage, even if you do not see improvements as soon as you begin taking the medication.
- You doctor will monitor your treatment to see how effective the preventive medication is for you.
- If you work on the computer on a day to day basis, try to take a 10-minute screen break every hour. Get up and walk around the office, get a cup of tea, or have a quick chat with a co-worker. You could also find a dark, quiet area and lie down for 10 minutes to rest your eyes and prevent tension headaches.
- If you suffer from frequent or severe headaches you should see a doctor as soon as possible. This is especially true if your headaches wake you up at night or occur first thing in the morning.
- If your headache is sudden, severe, and associated with vomiting, confusion, numbness, weakness, or changes in vision, get emergency medical attention.
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| How to Fix a Relationship Posted: 05 Jan 2017 12:00 AM PST If you're having a problem in your relationship, you're not alone. Most people have trouble in relationships at one point or another. However, you can make it work out if you decide to work together to fix it, starting with trying to understand what's gone wrong in your relationship. EditUnderstanding the Problem - Recognize the problems. Any number of problems could be plaguing your relationship. Maybe one person is contributing more than the other, or maybe you just aren't connecting. You should look for signs and symptoms of the problems you're facing. Here's what you should look for:[1]
- You feel like your partner wants you to be a different person than you are, such as your partner is not wanting you to do certain things you normally like doing, is wanting you to change your personality, or is trying to be controlling of your person and actions. The reverse is also true; that is, if you feel like you keep wanting to change your partner, that could be a sign of a problem.[2]
- You are having the same arguments over and over or your arguments never reach a resolution.[3]
- You find you aren't together as much as you used to be or would like to be.[4]
- One person has more control of the resources in the relationship or one of you just doesn't feel like the relationship is equal in some way.[5]
- Talk about it with your partner. Bring up the fact that you think there is a problem with your relationship.[6] Be as specific as you possibly can when talking about what you think the problem is, but also make sure you are not angry when you decide to bring it up. In calm tone, discuss what you think is going wrong with the relationship.
- For instance, you could say, "Honey, I'd like to spend some time talking to you about our relationship. I think we've had trouble connecting lately, and I'd like to discuss how we can fix it."
- Studies have suggested that talking about what's wrong and what's right on a regular basis can help lead to a better relationship in the long term because you aren't bottling up small problems into a much bigger problem.[7]
- Look at patterns, not people. That is, it's easy to blame each other for problems. You might find yourself saying "I hate it when you leave dirty dishes in the sink," which essentially blames the other person. Instead, look at the patterns. For instance, you could say, "When I forget to unload the dishwasher, you tend to leave dirty dishes in the sink. Then I get behind on the dishes because they pile up. How can we work to change this situation?"[8]
EditLearning to Discuss Better - Stop bottling it up. If little things are bothering you and you shove them down, they are just going to turn into an explosion at a bad time. If you deal with them as they happen, it won't be as big of a deal.[9]
- Keep emotions at bay. If you find yourself starting a discussion while angry or getting angry while in the middle of a discussion, you may need to spend some time calming down. You know what calms you down. Maybe you need to take a short walk, listen to some music, or take a relaxing shower. You can also try counting to ten or taking a few deep breathes. Whatever you need to do, take a few minutes to calm down before continuing the discussion.[10]
- Look for warning signs. If you find yourself feeling like you absolutely must win an argument, it's time to take a break. At that point, you're likely to say something you regret or keep the argument going long past the point that it's wise to do so.[11]
- Think about what the other person is going through. When you're angry, you're just thinking about how you've been wronged. However, as soon as you start forcing yourself to think about what the other person is going through, you start to pull yourself out of that mindset. Being empathetic can help drain your anger.[12]
- It's important to respect what your partner is feeling, as he or she has a right to feel and express his or her emotions, whatever they are. Whether or not you think your partner is right about the problem, you should still validate what the person is feeling.[13]
- Listen attentively. Listening to what the other person has to say can help you develop empathy for what he or she is feeling. Don't just let the words pass over you. Actually think about what the person is saying, and maybe try to understand what is behind the words, as well.[14]
- One way to show you are listening is to try to summarize what the other person is saying. For example, you can say, "What I hear you saying is you get frustrated when you do more than your share of the housework."
- Another way to show you're listening is to ask relevant follow-up questions to make sure you understand what the other person is saying.
- Discuss your point of view calmly and clearly. You also have a right to discuss what you're feeling and thinking. The key is to keep a calm head. It's also important to be clear about what you're thinking and feeling. You can't expect your partner to read your mind when it comes to your thoughts and emotions.[15]
- Keep to talking about what you think about the problem, rather than placing blame. In other words, start with "I" instead of "You." For instance, you could say "I get anxious when the house isn't clean. Can we work on making a schedule for house cleaning so we can stay on top of it?" instead of "You never clean house with me!"[16]
- Find ways to compromise. The key to any relationship is learning to compromise. You can't just expect to win every argument, as relationships involve give and take. Compromising is about finding common ground, and both of you giving a little on the issue.[17]
- Discuss your needs and wants.[18] If you can decide on what both you need, you can give a little in the "wants" section. Basically, you need to decide what's most important to you and what's less important to you, and learn to give in the areas that aren't as important.
- If you hate cleaning the bathroom but your spouse wants you to help out around the house more, maybe you can divide chores into ones you find more tolerable and ones he or she finds more tolerable.
- Skip the past. When you're arguing, it's tempting to name-call or make unfair remarks that drag up the past. You know how to push your partner's buttons because you know him or her so well. However, all that will serve to do is make everyone angrier, and may even damage the relationship irrevocably. Keep to the task at hand.[19]
EditReintroducing the Connection - Make your relationship a priority. Apathy can be a problem in your relationship. Over time, you become accustomed to being in a relationship, and you stop putting as much effort into it as you once did. Once you understand how it can be a problem, you can work to change it.[20]
- Be respectful. Being mean towards each other can easily damage your relationship further. If you work hard to be kind and gentle with one another, it can help you reestablish the connection you once had.[21]
- Spend time connecting. When you're in a new relationship, you spend time talking to each other and learning what the other person likes. You discuss your fears and your interests, what you love and what you hate. If you've been in a relationship awhile, you may stop doing this together. If that's the case, you need to consciously work at rebuilding that connection by making time each day to talk. Make time for just the two of you, and when you do spend time together, try to dig deeper than just the day-to-day dramas that fill your life.[22]
- Try dating again. Another way to reconnect is to actually make plans to go on dates. Making a plan means you have something to look forward to, plus you're setting aside special time to spend just with the other person.[23]
- Don't forget to touch each other. Touch is such an important part of a relationship, and it doesn't mean just having sex. Kissing, holding hands, touching your partner's arm, and cuddling on the couch of all ways of being intimate. Touch provides a connection with your partner.[24]
EditDeciding How to Move Forward - Brainstorm concrete solutions. Once you've figured out what some of your problems are together, talk about solutions together. How can you solve the problem in a way that both of you can live with? In other words, you need to look for common ground.[25]
- Start with the place you both agree on. Maybe you can both agree on the problem at least, or maybe you can agree on the first step to the solution. For instance, maybe you agree that you are feeling disconnected. Maybe you can take it one step further and agree that you need to spend more time together.[26]
- Make a plan together. Once you've agreed to solutions, it's time to put them into concrete terms. For instance, if you both agree you need to spend more time, then maybe the agreement will be that you should make a date at least once a week.[27]
- Respect each others' needs. Everyone responds to situations differently, meaning that everyone has different emotional needs. For instance, maybe your partner needs more together time after things have been tough, so try to be there for him or her.[28]
- Keep communicating. When you feel the need to snap at your partner, examine what you're feeling. Instead of snapping, communicate how it is making you feel and why. In other words, you need to continually work on how you communicate with your partner, as your partner cannot be expected to guess what you're thinking or feeling.[29]
- For instance, if your partner mentions going out to dinner at a place she likes, you may want to snap at her for spending money if your budget is tight. Instead, say something such as, "Spending money right now makes me anxious because we've had a hard time making it to payday. Can we compromise and take a picnic out somewhere?"
- Don't forget to spend time on self-development. While it can be tempting to focus solely on your relationship, you also need to spend time developing your own interests. You bring more to a relationship when you are your own independent person, so spending time away from each other is important.[30]
- Don't be afraid of counseling. Even if your partner doesn't want to join you, counseling can still help your relationship. It will help because you're starting to change yourself and the way you interact with other people, including your partner. If your partner is willing to join you, even better.[31]
- If your relationship is abusive, it's time to get out. If your partner has harmed you physically or repeatedly demeans you, you shouldn't try to fix the relationship.
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