| How to Empower People Posted: 27 Nov 2021 12:00 AM PST From self-help books to motivational speeches, you've probably heard the term "empowerment" tossed around a few times. But what does this buzzword actually mean? Don't worry—we're here to answer all of your frequently asked questions. With a bit of patience and practice, you'll be able to empower your friends, co-workers, and even yourself. [Edit]What does it mean to empower someone? - Empowerment involves helping someone have control and authority over their life. With empowerment, you aren't "giving" someone this power or authority.[1] Instead, you're helping someone feel confident and capable enough to make choices on their own.[2]
[Edit]How can you empower your friends? - Listen to them with an open mind. When your friend opens up to you, try not to share your thoughts right away. Instead, give them plenty of time to say what's on their mind. Once they're done sharing, offer some supportive, open-ended questions to help walk your friend through their situation.[3]
- If your friend is upset about something their partner said to them, you might ask, "How would you feel if my partner said that to me?"
- Being a good listener reminds your friend that their thoughts and experiences are valid and important.
- Remind your friend what you love and care about them. If your friend is going through a rough patch, remind them about how wonderful they are, and how much they mean to you. Let your friend know that you'll always be there if they need you and that you'll be happy to lend them a listening ear whenever.[4]
- You might say, "I'm only a text away if you need someone to talk to."
- You could uplift your friend by saying "You're one of the kindest, funniest, and most caring people I know."
[Edit]How else can you empower your friends and loved ones? - Validate other people's perspectives. Give your friend or loved one your full attention, and then summarize what they just told you. Then, try to guess what they're thinking and feeling—taking that extra leap can help your loved one label and acknowledge their own feelings. Feel free to take your validation a step further by normalizing their feelings, and even sharing a similar experience of your own.[5]
- You could summarize a conversation by saying, "It sounds like you're pretty upset that Steve ignored you at work." Then, you might say, "You're probably wondering what went wrong, or asking yourself what you could've done differently."
- You might say, "I completely get why you're feeling upset. Being ignored is incredibly hurtful." You could even share, "I understand how you feel. A few months ago, my friend stopped replying to my texts, and I kept wondering what I did wrong."
- Encourage others to trust themselves. Remind your friends and loved ones to embrace their regrets, so they can learn and heal from their past mistakes. Your friends and family can also build self-trust by focusing on the present, instead of worrying about the past and future.[6]
- You might say, "I know you really regret bumping into your neighbor's fender. What matters is that you owned up to your mistake, paid for the damages, and became a more careful driver."
- You could suggest, "Yesterday is already over, and tomorrow is still a day away. Try focusing on what today has to offer!"
[Edit]How can you empower others as a leader? - Compliment the people on your team. Don't focus on your most talented employees; instead, praise everyone who gives their best effort at work. Lots of praise may encourage your teammates to grow and improve in the long run.[7]
- Give your workers time to succeed. A little extra time can go a long way in the workplace. While you can't always set long deadlines, a bit of extra time can give your team members more wiggle room to experiment and explore. In the workplace, extra time equals improved results.[8]
- Forgive your team when they mess up. While mistakes can be frustrating, punishing your team is never the answer. Instead, set aside some time to review what minor and major mistakes look like, so your employees know what to avoid in the future.[9]
- For example, organizing an unsuccessful advertising campaign is an acceptable mistake while posting false advertisements would be an unacceptable mistake.
[Edit]How do you empower yourself? - Keep an open mind. For better or for worse, life is full of self-fulfilling prophecies. Let's say you're applying for a new job, but you don't feel very confident. You convince yourself you won't get the job ahead of time, and you end up performing poorly at the interview, where you don't end up landing the position. Instead of thinking about what you can't do, focus on all the potential opportunities waiting for you out in the world.[10]
- Instead of thinking "Today is going to be a bad day," you might think, "I don't know what the day will bring, but I'm excited for whatever's in store!"
- Focus on yourself, not the world around you. In our day-to-day lives, there's plenty we can't control. However, you can control how you respond to life's challenges. Focus on who you are as a person and what you truly stand for. As you live your truth, your success will speak for you.[11]
- For example, don't compare yourself to a co-worker who seems to get more praise and attention from your boss. Instead, focus on producing the best possible work that you can.
- If you're falling behind in math class, take time to ask your teacher for help instead of comparing yourself to other students.
- Learn from your mistakes. Being empowered isn't about being perfect—it's about learning and growing from your failures. Use your mistakes as an opportunity to learn and improve, so you can grow into a stronger, more capable person.[12]
- For instance, if you used the wrong formula in a spreadsheet, make a mental note of the correct formula to use for next time.
- If you miss a doctor's appointment, set extra reminders for your next appointment so you arrive on time.
[Edit]How do you feel empowered when you have a mental illness? - Own your life experiences instead of feeling ashamed. Ignore anyone who criticizes your diagnosis, or makes you feel lesser because of your life experiences. Remind yourself that their thoughts and opinions don't matter and that they don't get to decide how you feel about yourself.[13]
- Try thinking something like, "People who judge me because of my mental illness aren't worth my time" or "I can't control what other people think about me, but I can control how I view myself."
- Share your experiences with uneducated people. If you hear someone making a harsh, judgmental comment about mental illness or mentally ill individuals, take a moment to politely educate them on why their words are hurtful. Then, kindly explain how their comments only add to the stigma of mental illness in the long run.[14]
- For example, you might say, "I know you didn't mean any harm, but try not to use words like lunatic or psycho to describe someone with a mental illness.[15]
- You could also say something like, "You shouldn't compare 2 people with the same diagnosis. Mental illnesses have a wide variety of symptoms, and many people have different experiences."
[Edit]References |
| How to Prune a Tree Posted: 26 Nov 2021 04:00 PM PST Pruning helps trees grow strong and look neat and attractive. One prunes a tree to remove damaged branches, allow for new growth or create a distinctive shape. It's important to do it correctly, so you don't end up damaging the tree. Read on to learn the basics. [Edit]Deciding What to Prune - Think about why you want to prune. Are you trying to shape a tree for shade or height? Has the tree been pruned recently? Before you begin, you want to consider what you are trying to achieve and set your goals.[1]
- Your reasons for pruning will influence when you prune as well. You can do light pruning or remove dead wood at any time, but if you have larger goals, you'll want to plan your pruning around the seasons.
- For instance, pruning in the winter will result in an explosion of growth during the spring. Pruning during the summer will slow the growth of the cut branch, so it's a good strategy if you're trying to shape your tree or slow the growth of branches you don't want.
- Assess the tree. Spend a few moments looking at the tree's size and shape and imagining how it should look when you are finished.
- Identify the major branches of the tree that make up its "skeleton." Avoid removal of these branches.[2]
- Remove branches that show signs of damage first. Whether they were damaged by a storm or some other event, broken branches should be pruned so that the water and nutrients they're still taking from the tree get redistributed to healthy branches.[3]
- Thin out areas that are thick with branches. Remove branches that cross, then open the plant so that air might circulate and light reach all parts of the plant. In order for trees to grow healthy, they need good air circulation through and around the branches. Branches that are close together foster the growth of fungus and attract more insects.
- Eliminate branches that are growing inward, toward the center of the tree. These cause clutter and are not healthy.
- Prune branches that act as obstructions. Whether they're low branches blocking your walkway or higher branches threatening your telephone wires, rubbing your roof, or overhang your house. It's fine to prune the branches that are causing some type of annoyance.
- Prune branches to help shape the tree. If you'd like your tree to have a more rounded or neat looking shape, prune a few branches that seem to stick out at odd angles; a few cuts will make a big difference.[4]
- Prune as little as possible. Each cut you make compromises the tree protection system and opens the tree to potential fungus and insect infestation. Prune only as much as you absolutely need to prune, and never remove more than 25 percent of a tree's branches.
- For most deciduous trees, make sure that there are living branches on at least 2/3 of the tree, though this varies by species. Be aware that the trunk alone is not enough to ensure that the tree will survive. Removing all the branches is highly stressful for the plant.
- Don't prune heavily more than once per season. Unless a storm breaks more branches, you shouldn't prune more than once, since the tree needs time to recover.
[Edit]Pruning to Minimize Damage - Take out your pruning tools in the dormant season. Pruning during the late fall or early winter puts less stress on the tree, since it minimizes sap loss. Pruning during this time of year is also better for the tree because it's less likely the "wound" you make will get infected by insects or fungus, which are also relatively active in the late fall and early winter.[5]
- A good time marker is to prune after the leaves have fallen off the tree. This means the tree is dormant until early spring.
- If a storm during a different part of the year causes a branch to break, it's OK to prune it immediately instead of waiting for winter.
- Make a cut on the underside of the branch. This initial cut shouldn't go all the way through the branch. It is made to prevent the branch from cracking too close to the trunk of the tree when the weight of the branch is ready to fall.[6]
- The cut should be made on the branch side of what is called the stem collar. This is the small lip of bark that each branch protrudes from. You want to leave the collar intact, so don't cut flush with the trunk.
- Cut off the branch several inches from the trunk. Your second cut will saw through the branch, on the outside (further from the trunk) of the first cut you made. Remove the branch from the area; what you have left is a stub.[7]
- Make a precise cut to remove the stub. Now you can make another cut almost right against the stem collar. This gives the tree the best chance of healing in a quick, healthy way.
- Be sure you don't actually cut off the branch collar. This must remain intact.
- Clean your pruning equipment. Although it is probably not necessary to disinfect your pruning equipment if you avoid cutting into cankers and obviously diseased portions of trees, it probably is better to be safe and disinfect your pruning tools with rubbing alcohol (or any household cleaner) after each cut of a diseased tree. You should also dip or rub the blades with a disinfectant impregnated cloth after the pruning of a healthy tree is complete, and before you move to the next tree or bush. Diseases are sometimes spread through dirty pruning equipment and pruning tools.
- Dead or dying wood can be removed at any time.
- Check a gardening resource (for example, your cooperative extension) for the proper time of year to prune specific trees in your geographic area.
- For small branches use pruning shears. For medium size (1"+diameter) use lopping shears (anvil or bypass). For anything larger than use a tree saw. Do not use hedge shears when pruning trees.
- Carry a small amount of isopropyl alcohol or other household cleaner in a container that cannot be tipped over and that is large enough to dip your pruning equipment into. Pruning can easily carry disease from tree to tree and frequent dipping of the cutting tool(s) can help eliminate this risk. This is especially important in small densely-packed orchards.
[Edit]Warnings - Prune conifers with caution, particularly if used as a hedging plant. Conifers will only put out new shoots from green wood. So, if the conifer is used as a hedge plant and you prune until it shows no green, that is the way that it will stay.
- Do not top shade trees. Topping a tree is pruning it for height - shade trees are meant to grow tall. Topping has serious implications re branch structure/strength and overall tree health. Do not attempt to control the height of a large tree by shearing the top. Plant a different tree instead.
- Always prune safely. Wear a long sleeve shirt, gloves to protect your hands, and safety goggles to prevent foreign objects from damaging your eyes.
[Edit]Things You'll Need - Hand pruners (for small, thin branches)
- Loppers
- Hand saw
- Pole saw (for hard-to-reach branches)
- Ladder
- Cleaning agent (e.g. isopropyl alcohol)
[Edit]Related wikiHows [Edit]References [Edit]Quick Summary |
| How to Play Abalone Posted: 26 Nov 2021 08:00 AM PST Abalone is a simple board game that up to 4 people can play at a time that involves strategy, defense, and thinking ahead. The objective of the game is to knock 6 of your opponent's marbles off the board while keeping your own in play. If you'd like to play Abalone at your next game night, brush up on the rules and strategies of the game so you can claim your bragging rights. [Edit]Setting up the Board - Position the game board between 2 people. Traditionally, Abalone is played between 2 people. Set up the board so that the 2 players are sitting across from each other with the board in between them.[1]
- You can add up to 2 more players, but you have to buy an additional set of marbles for each additional player. All the same rules of the game apply, even if you add more players, but the board might look a little crazy!
- Set up the marbles with black on one side and white on the other. Each player gets 14 marbles each, with 1 black set and 1 white set. Put your marbles in a row of 5, then 6, then 3 in the rows closest to you on the board. The row of 5 marbles should be the one closest to you.[2]
- Position the row of 3 so that the marbles are centered in the third row so that there are 2 empty spaces on either side.
- Let the person with black marbles make the first move. Traditionally, the person who chooses the black set of marbles always makes the first move. Then, you'll take turns making moves back and forth. If you want to switch off who goes first each round, you can change up the rules a little bit.[3]
[Edit]Playing and Winning the Game - Move 1 to 3 marbles 1 space on the board. When it's your turn to go, you can move either 1, 2, or 3 marbles at a time, as long as they are in the same row (a straight line). The line of marbles can be diagonal or straight across, and you can move either diagonally or straight up and down into an empty space on the board.[4]
- Take a look at the game board to figure out how many marbles you should move. You want to push your opponent's pieces off the board, but you don't want to leave your own pieces open to an attack.
- The Abalone board is set up so that you can literally push the marbles into their new spaces with your fingers. You don't need to pick them up each time.
- Try to push your opponent's marbles off the board. The objective of the game is to get as many of your opponent's marbles off the grid by using your marbles to push them off. When you move your marbles, get close to your opponent's marbles so you have more of a chance to push them.[5]
- You can push the marbles off at any point on the board as long as they fall off the edge.
- Place the discarded marbles onto the edges of the game board so they don't roll away.
- Push your opponent's marbles out of place if you have more. You can only push your opponent's marbles off the grid if you are moving a set of marbles that has 1 more than your opponent's row. For example, if you are moving 2 marbles and come upon 1 lone marble of your opponent's, you can push it. However, if you came upon 2 marbles with your 2 marbles, you couldn't push them.[6]
- A helpful phrase to remember is 3 pushes 2, 3 pushes 1, and 2 pushes 1.
- Remember, you can only move 1 space at a time. You may have to spend a couple of moves pushing a single marble off the board, especially if it starts in the center.
- Watch the game board to plan your next move. As you and your opponent's marbles get mixed, you really have to think about what your next move might do. Keep track of the game board closely and try to track your next few moves ahead of time.[7]
- For example, if you push your opponent's marble off the board with 2 of yours, you could be opening yourself up for an attack as you move close to the edge.
- Try to move 2 to 3 marbles at a time. The best way to push your opponent's marbles off the board is to move as many marbles as you can when it's your turn. Since you have to have more marbles in a line to push your opponent's off the board, it's best to move at least 2 marbles if not 3.[8]
- Try to keep your marbles clumped close together so that you can move multiple at a time. If they're spread all over the board, it will be a lot harder to get them back together again.
- End the game when 1 player has 6 marbles pushed off the board. If you manage to push 6 of your opponent's marbles off the board, you've won! You can start the game over again or call it quits after that.[9]
- You can't bring a marble back into play once it's been pushed off the board.
- A round of Abalone only lasts about 15 minutes.
- You can either be aggressive and try to knock all of your opponent's marbles off the board first, or you can go on the offense and make it hard for your opponent to take out your marbles.
[Edit]Things You'll Need - Abalone board
- 14 black marbles
- 14 white marbles
[Edit]References [Edit]Quick Summary |
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