| How to Explain Racism to a Child Posted: 27 Jul 2017 05:00 PM PDT Explaining racism to a child is not easy. You may be afraid that you will use the wrong words, or confuse the child. This article will help you to understand how to explain racism to a child. EditProviding a Solid Background - Recognize that children are not color-blind.[1] Unless your child is blind, they can see that other people have different skin tones and may begin making associations if they notice patterns that relate to skin tones. Using words like "Native American" and "white" allows children to have words for what they see, and can de-mystify it.[2]
- Expose your child to media involving characters of all races. Because media tends to focus on white people, it may take a conscious effort to consume inclusive media.[3][4] This is crucial for white children as well as children of color.
- Buy dolls of various races, not only white dolls.
- Discuss stereotypes as you see them. If your child notices a lot of black athletes, for example, explain that this is a stereotype and that there are many black people in various roles: doctors, nannies, lawyers, biologists, professors, et cetera.[5]
- Be a good role model. Children copy what they see others doing, so be an example of an accepting, humble person. Be aware of the language you use around your child and make sure you don't make racist comments or jokes in front of them, as this could encourage your child to use racist behavior. If someone calls you out for being accidentally racist, listen to them carefully and apologize.
- If you notice someone being a victim of racist behavior, stand up for the victim, as your child would mimic your behavior if they were ever placed in a similar situation.
- Do this even when your child isn't looking. It's part of being a good person, and you'll be a role model for other people (children and otherwise) who are watching.
- Explain differences in an accepting, casual manner. This shows your child that diversity is nothing to be afraid of. Speak calmly about how being different doesn't make someone weird or bad, it just means that everyone is unique. Explain how different groups of people are different in some ways (languages, traditions, etc.) and similar in others (loving families, dreams about the future, etc.), and that this is a positive thing.[6]
- For example, "Mommy has dark skin because she is black. I have light skin because I am white. And you are both! People come in all different colors." Or, "Angel speaks differently because his family speaks Spanish at home. It doesn't make him weird."
- When explaining, make sure that you make the message age-appropriate. For example, if your child is between the ages 3-5 use literal examples such as "Eggs come in different colors, but they are the same on the inside."[7]
- Be truthful about injustice when it happens, and when they learn about it in school.[8] When your child witnesses someone being mean, or something unfair, be honest about the situation instead of trying to cover it up. Give a clear explanation of what was wrong and why. This can teach children that adults aren't always right, bad things do happen, and it isn't the victim's fault.
- For young children, keep it simple. "Yes, it was wrong and hurtful to say that to Daddy" or "Life can be unfair. Sometimes we can change it, and sometimes we can't" are examples of simple explanations.
- For questions like "Why don't white people like us?", explain that there are some mean people in the world, but not everyone feels this way.[9]
- Trying to hide the truth from the child will only make them curious and confused. It's better to offer an honest explanation, even if it's highly simplified.
- Remember that one racist remark doesn't mean your child is 100% racist. Children test boundaries and explore ideas, and your child may say things that they don't fully mean (to see how others react). Providing loving and clear guidance can help your child learn what is and is not okay.[10]
- Ask questions to encourage critical thinking, like "Why do you think that?" and "How do you know that?" Explore their reasoning together.
EditExplaining Racism - Be honest and open, starting from a young age. This will help them to grow as a person, as if they ever experience racist behaviors as a child they would understand that it is inappropriate; however if they didn't know what racism is and they witness racist behaviors, they may mimic it and cause offence to others.
- If you try to hide the subject of race, it won't stop children from noticing. However, it may lead them to think that there is something shameful about the topic.[11]
- Don't fear questions. Instead, consider them teachable moments. If your child asks about race, says something racist, or asks about something racist they heard, this is an opportunity to teach them.[12][13]
- It's okay to say "I'm not sure" or "Let me take some time to think about that."
- Encourage critical thinking about the media and its stereotypes.[14] Your child will see racial stereotypes on the media. You can help them learn not to believe them by teaching them to think critically and question the messages they hear.
- Is it fair that the villain Jafar looks more stereotypically Arab than the hero Aladdin, and how might people who look "stereotypically Arab" feel about that?
- If Asians are left out of movies, could they be left out on the playground too?
- How could your child be a good helper?
- Use stories to explain racism. Teaching your children about racism through stories about people who fought against it, such as Rosa Parks, Malcolm X, Cesar Chavez, and more can help your child to understand more about racism and how times have changed because people have stood up for what they believed in.
- This can also help your child to learn how to have empathy, an important skill for children to develop.
- Teach your child that there are different types of racism. Children usually mistake racism for being just about skin color. However that isn't the case as racism can be about race, hair color, nose shape, hair texture, etc.
- Ensure that your child understands that racism is wrong no matter what, whether it's about someone's skin tone or the flatness of their nose.
- Find a video on YouTube about racism. If you are worried about using the wrong words when explaining to your child about racism, or if you are bad at explaining things, watching a video would not only be helpful to you, but it would also help your child to visually experience what racism is.
- Visually experiencing something will help your child to spot when someone is racist, and this will allow your child to evaluate the situation and put a stop to it.
- Teach them to stand against racism. Make sure your child knows that any type of discrimination is hurtful and wrong, even if it was meant as a 'joke'.
- Teaching your child to stand up for victims of racist comments is helping them to understand what behavior is acceptable and what behavior isn't.
- Teach white children to use their privilege for good. After hearing the terrible things that have happened in history, children will most likely be upset. These conversations can be painful and messy--which also means that your child will learn and grow a lot.[15] Explain that because of their privilege, people listen to them more. They can use this to defend people of color from racism. Turn the conversation into a positive message about how they can stand up for others.[16]
- Encourage them to listen to people of color if they say that something is racist or hurting them. Listening matters, and it makes the difference between a "white knight" who rushes in to wildly defend others, and a good ally.
- Explain that children of color can speak for themselves, and should have this opportunity. If one of their friends is having trouble doing this, suggest that the child help their friend brainstorm strategies for speaking up and that they have their friend's back.[17]
- Discuss concrete strategies for how your child can stand up when they see racism. Can they intervene using their words? When should they get help from an adult (and what do they do if the adult ignores the problem)? You can even role-play if they are interested. Discussing clear strategies will help your child know what to do when a situation arises.
- If your child does this, tell them how proud you are.[18]
- Be prepared to explain that "reverse racism" is not considered by most to be real racism. Racism relies on the fact that people of color have been treated badly in the past, and still face this today (lack of opportunities, police brutality, et cetera).[19] While white people can have hurt feelings, and have real problems not related to their race, the idea that they actually experience racism is refuted by most people of color.
- Don't create fear in their heart. If you do, they may be afraid of the word racism. Just make them aware of it.
EditSources and Citations
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| How to Grade Hair Extensions Posted: 27 Jul 2017 09:00 AM PDT Hair extensions are given grades, meant to indicate their quality. Unfortunately, these grades--starting at A (or 1A) and going up to AAAAA (or 5A) or higher--are not regulated and may not be consistent from brand to brand. Additionally, there is some disagreement about what these grades mean. By learning the specifics of each, you will be able to distinguish between 100% human hair, Remy hair, and Virgin hair. Furthermore, by looking at the length of strands in your hair extensions and evaluating the overall quality of the hair, you can determine the grades of hair extensions for yourself. EditDistinguishing Between 100% Human, Remy, and Virgin Hair - Make sure it is 100% human hair. All graded hair extensions (1A and up) should be composed of 100% human hair. Unfortunately, many companies may include strands of animal or synthetic fibers. The best way to determine if hair is 100% human is to look for cuticle scales under a microscope. You can also test for synthetic fibers by seeing if the hair is easily damaged (melts) by heat styling.[1]
- Look for Remy hair. "Remy hair" refers to 100% human hair extensions in which the strands are arranged in a unilateral cuticle direction. Remy hair is collected in such a way that strands of hair stay aligned in the direction they grew. For instance, this can mean holding the hair in a ponytail and cutting it off.[2]
- Keeping the cuticles in the same direction reduces tangles and helps hair to last longer.
- If the hair becomes matted in 2-3 weeks, you will know that it's not real Remy.
- Identify genuine Virgin hair. Virgin hair is 100% human Remy hair that has never been chemically treated or processed. This is the highest quality hair you can buy. There are essentially six ways to verify that what you have purchased is authentic virgin hair.[3] These are:
- The presence of split ends. If there are zero split ends, this means the hair has been acid washed.
- You can feel the cuticle. If you hold a strand between your fingers and slide your hand down, it should be smooth. If you try to move the other direction, you should feel tiny ridges.
- The hair will often be lighter at the tips than at the roots (though not always).
- The hair that is stitched to the track and reversed (often called the mustache or beard) is very soft.
- The hair has not been coated with silicone. It should not have a shiny residue.
- It smells like hair. The chemicals used to disguise non-Virgin hair smell a bit like corn chips.
EditLooking at Strand Lengths - Measure the length of the strands. According to some sources, the grade of hair extensions does not indicate the quality of the hair at all, but rather the length of the strands. For example, in a bundle of 18 inches (45.72 cm) hair extensions, not every strand will measure the full 18 inches (45.72 cm). The higher the number of strands per bundle that measure the full length, the greater the grade of the hair. Look carefully through your bundle to evaluate the proportion of full-length hairs to shorter-hairs.[4]
- Grade A (1A) hair will have 50% or less full-length strands.
- Grade AAA (3A) will have around 70% full-length strands.
- Grade AAAAA (5A) and up should have at least 90% full-length strands.
- Distinguish between single-drawn and double-drawn. Single-drawn hair bundles, and bundles that are essentially gathered together once, and then trimmed to the desired length (such as 18 inches/45.72 cm). This process results in around 50% of strands that are the full-length of the bundle. Double-drawn hair bundles are processed twice, achieving closer to 90% of strands that are full-length. Fold a bundle of hair extensions in half and look for shorter hairs popping out. If you see this, most likely the hair has been single-drawn.[5]
- If the non-uniform length of hair does not bother you, single-drawn hair is a more cost-effective option.
- Both Remy and non-Remy hair can be either single or double-drawn.
- Compare the thickness of different bundles. The higher the proportion of full-length hairs in a given bundle are the thicker the bundle will be. Furthermore, higher grade double-drawn hair should have a completely uniform thickness from top to bottom. If the bundle of hair seems to grow thinner towards the bottom, it is of a lower grade.[6]
EditEvaluating the Quality - Rate how much it tangles. Unfortunately, evaluating the quality of hair extensions is difficult to do just by looking. In most cases, getting a sense of bundle's quality will require some wearing time. One of the factors when determining the grade of hair extensions involves tangle. Hair bundles with the majority of strands moving in a unilateral direction (such as Remy hair) will tangle much less easily. In other words, the more easily your hair becomes knotted or tangles, the lower the grade.[7]
- See how long it lasts. With proper care, hair extensions should last for a while. The length of time that the hair stays shiny, healthy, and natural-looking is reflected by the hair's grade.[8] Here is a basic guide:
- Grade A (1A) hair should last around one month.
- Grade AAA (3A) hair should last 3-4 months.
- Grade AAAAA (5A) can last anywhere from 8-12 months.
- Gauge how the hair responds to coloring. The highest quality hair extensions (5A and/or Virgin hair) have had the least amount of chemical treatment. This means the hair can be successfully dyed. Lower grade hair extensions will not respond as well to coloring, and may only be able to move within 3-4 shades of their original color without significant damage.[9]
EditSources and Citations
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| How to Choose a First Knitting Project Posted: 27 Jul 2017 01:00 AM PDT You'd like to start out knitting! How exciting! There's so many things to knit, but what will you choose? Start reading below for help! Just make sure you know how to knit and purl. EditChoosing Your Material - Choose a yarn weight. Consider your amount of patience, as the weight of yarn you choose and your personal amount of patience are directly related.
- If you are willing to spend lots of time on a project, you can choose a lighter-weight yarn. This will take some extra time, but will produce a thinner, soft knitted piece.
- If you want the project to come along faster and are okay with thicker knitting, go for a bulky yarn. This is also suitable for beginners since it's easier to grip and see your stitches.
- Remember to choose needles that fit the weight of yarn you're using.
- If knitting straight from a pattern, always choose around right weight, or you might end up with something different than you expected.
- Choose your fiber. If you're making a scarf, you probably don't want to choose a scratchy wool. If you are making a dishcloth, merino is definitely not a good choice! Instead, choose a fiber that you like and that will work well for the project you're making.
- Name your price. If you have a low budget, you don't want to be purchasing loads of expensive luxury yarn. Once you have an idea of what type of yarn you'd like, look online and offline to find something that matches your budget.
EditFinding a Project - Consider how much time and effort you're willing to devote to this project. A hard project isn't a good start since you'll get discouraged quickly if you make mistakes.
- Begin with something small or simple. Good choices for beginners are a coaster, dishcloth, or scarf.
- A scarf might take a while, but it can give you lots of valuable practice with one or two stitches.
- A coaster or dishcloth are perfect for beginners, as they provide immediate gratification because of their small size and their small amount of work. Additionally, they make great gifts for a loved one if you want to give something handmade!
- Choose a project with stockinette stitch or garter stitch. These stitch patterns use only the knit and purl stitches, and won't puzzle you like more advanced stitch patterns such as ribbing or seed stitch.
EditMaking the Piece - Follow your pattern's instructions. Cast on, and begin knitting!
- It may seem like your project isn't coming out right, but chances are it will look better as you continue on the pattern.
- Allow room for mistakes. Nobody can make a beautiful, perfect knitted piece on their first try. Prepare to drop or twist some stitches, have a weird tension, or have your project come out a shape different than the one you intended. This doesn't mean you did a bad job; it simply means you're still learning.
- If you feel yourself getting frustrated, put your knitting down for a while and come back to it later.
- Don't overwork yourself. It may be tempting to put in tons and tons of effort on your first day or two, but this will lead to you feeling burnt out and bored with the project quickly. Work a little each day, but don't spend hours and hours at a time working on the same thing.
- Finish your project. Cast off, cut your yarn, and weave in the ends with a tapestry needle. You're finished!
EditThings You'll Need - Yarn
- Needles
- Tapestry needle
- Scissors
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